The Moneyist: ‘He got a chunk of money when he divorced’: My boyfriend had problems paying rent before I moved in. I’m afraid I’ll end up paying the bills. Am I cheap?

by | Jun 29, 2022 | Stock Market

Dear Quentin, I am a 33-year-old female and I have a boyfriend who is 37. I make about twice as much as he does. We have been talking about marriage, having a baby, and buying a house, etc. which I love to do as I see the future with him, and I do love him. However, I do also have a few concerns about our future. 

“‘I make about twice as much as he does.’”

He has a full-time job and he once told me that he was not making enough money to pay rent, his personal loans etc., and he had to use his savings. (He got a chunk of money when he divorced.) He was having trouble making ends meet until I moved in and we started to split the rent, utilities, and groceries.

I am afraid that it will strain our relationship if I am the one who ends up paying most of the expenses, and I feel like it is not fair. Do I not love him enough to be OK with it? Am I being cheap? I am not sure what I should do to feel comfortable with his financial issues. I would like to have some peace of mind. Please help. The Future WifeDear Future, There is a big difference between someone being paid less than their partner, having trouble managing their finances, and being a layabout and/or reckless with their money. In your case, it sounds like your partner has gone through a divorce, and needed time to steady the ship financially. He was open with you about his financial struggles, and before you get married you should be equally open with each other about balancing your books.  Marriage is a contract — a romantic and business contract, given that you are legally and financially bound to each oth …

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