There’s a quaint term—etiquette—that applies to good manners. From setting the dinner table to using tactful language, past generations have largely tried to maintain some decorum. Etiquette still resonates with many retirees. Younger people may act respectfully but disregard formal aspects of etiquette that older folks continue to live by.
“I think older people are more considerate,” said Lisa Mirza Grotts, a San Francisco-based etiquette expert. “They’re more apt to use honorifics and offer their seats [on a bus] to others. They’re just much nicer.” The challenge for older individuals is keeping track of ever-changing social mores. With everyone glued to their phones, some may wonder whether they even need to maintain polite eye contact in face-to-face conversation. If they receive lots of texts, can they respond with an old-fashioned phone call or is that uncouth? If their grandkids send a link to their social-media post, what’s the appropriate response? Read: ‘We stay in two-star hotels’: We’re 70 and have $1.8 million, but my husband insists on living cheap. Don’t we have enough? Adapting to the digital age can require adjustments, says Grotts, author of “A Traveler’s Passport to Etiquette.” If you get a text, replying by text is often your safest bet. If you’re participating in a family Zoom call or group email chat, it may take practice to chime in succinctly and ask trenchant questions rather than hold court and tell long, rambling stories. “For older people, speed is their enemy,” Grotts said. “They’re not used to the pace of life” driven by constant pings and 10-second videos. Then there’s the question of whether et …
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