Dear Moneyist, I’m 35 and have been dating a man 20 years older than me; he is 55. I have a 5-year-old child. Things were going well until we started having conversations about the relationship being serious and possibly merging our assets.
He shared his home with his ex-wife after being married for 20 years. He recently took out a second mortgage on that home. He also has adult children in their late 20s, and they seem to still be heavily dependent on him for financial support. He is repaying his own student loans, and also those for his children. I own my home free and clear. My student loans will be paid off within the next two years, and I made a few good investments so I have quite a bit of funds in savings and a good retirement account.A standoff over the future When we discussed taking steps to move the relationship forward and discussed marriage, I expressed that I would be willing to sell my current home, purchase a new home and asked that he do the same so we can build a life together. He was completely opposed to this plan. His ideal plan: I move into his current house that he shared with his ex-wife until he can pay it off, w …
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