How not to comfort the mourning: Hospital chaplain J.S. Park talks grief in new book

by | Apr 16, 2024 | Religion

(RNS) — “Everything happens for a reason” might be one of the least helpful things you can say to someone who just lost a loved one, according to veteran hospital chaplain J.S. Park.But while Park understands why people grasp for what he calls “Swiss cheese theology” in moments of loss, working as an interfaith chaplain at a Level 1 trauma center in Tampa, Florida, has taught him that grief is less about letting go and moving on, and more about letting in and moving with. In his latest book, “As Long as You Need: Permission to Grieve,” Park draws on nearly a decade of sitting with people on the worst day of their lives, offering vivid stories from the bedside and his own life to show why an unrushed, authentic approach to grieving allows people to honor their loss for what it is.
Religion News Service spoke to Park about how not to talk to the grieving, how Park lost and found his Christian faith as a chaplain and where he finds moments of resurrection in a career that routinely faces death. This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
What are some of the myths about grief you hope to debunk in this book?  
The biggest myth I see is that grief is a poison to get past. There’s positive inten …

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[mwai_chat context=”Let’s have a discussion about this article:nn(RNS) — “Everything happens for a reason” might be one of the least helpful things you can say to someone who just lost a loved one, according to veteran hospital chaplain J.S. Park.But while Park understands why people grasp for what he calls “Swiss cheese theology” in moments of loss, working as an interfaith chaplain at a Level 1 trauma center in Tampa, Florida, has taught him that grief is less about letting go and moving on, and more about letting in and moving with. In his latest book, “As Long as You Need: Permission to Grieve,” Park draws on nearly a decade of sitting with people on the worst day of their lives, offering vivid stories from the bedside and his own life to show why an unrushed, authentic approach to grieving allows people to honor their loss for what it is.
Religion News Service spoke to Park about how not to talk to the grieving, how Park lost and found his Christian faith as a chaplain and where he finds moments of resurrection in a career that routinely faces death. This interview has been edited for length and clarity.
What are some of the myths about grief you hope to debunk in this book?  
The biggest myth I see is that grief is a poison to get past. There’s positive inten …nnDiscussion:nn” ai_name=”RocketNews AI: ” start_sentence=”Can I tell you more about this article?” text_input_placeholder=”Type ‘Yes'”]
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